Monday, December 21, 2009

DREAMER .......

"your clock has started ticking", gasping for air, finding it hard to keep her eyes open,but these words sounding loud and clear in her mind. she realized she had almost forgot about it. Her mind went wandering to her childhood when her cousins would tell her that they dreamt her flying a helicopter, riding a big white horse, riding a loin and she with enthusiasm declaring, "yeh i remember , that was me , did you see how beautiful clothes i was wearing". these self deceleration were what the older cousins of her liked, they enjoyed these wild exaggerating of her imagination, for them it was an enjoyable performance. Her mother encouraged her to dream bigger and bigger, even after knowing that others where everyday cooking up stories and letting the girl to complete those wild imaginations. one day in the morning the little girl came running to her mother and said that she dreamt herself riding a white elephant and a herd following her. Her mother told her not share this dream to anybody, it was a dream dreamt by those who were going to rule over a kingdom.

She grew up, but her thoughts and words always made her to look much older than the other kids of her age group. when other girls were playing with dolls, she was discussing politics with her grandfather,these kinds of behavior always made her the odd one out among her age group. The other thing that she was gifted with was winning of hearts, making people smile in worst times even though she was terrible with jokes, helping people even if she didn't know them. With time her dreams became bigger and bigger, she started to dream about other people, she had started to dream for them, she started to dream about a Utopian state. she used to say, "dream big and keep your eyes open while dreaming , u will get it". She even dreamt about her exit from this world, half of the world with moist eyes saying her good bye, she wanted herself to be remembered long after she was gone, she wanted to continue to live even with out physical presence. she wanted to be there in the hearts of people till eternity.

As is the case with dreams , all can't be true. her dream also was broken even before she had finished dreaming, with these very words, "your clock has started ticking". She visited a doctor for an ailment which seemed to be a not so serious thing, but the doctors words changed her whole life for ever. it had been five years since then and she had kept on moving from one place to another, not being at a place for more than a year. Trying to not to get attached to people, but where ever she went every single soul that she touched was overwhelmed by her caring and charming nature. but with the passing years she had mastered one Act of her's - "Vanishing". When ever she felt that she was getting attached to any place or people she would just vanish in thin air, no goodbyes.

she had been in the current place for more than a year and was finding it hard to do what she did best, "vanish". she had tried to vanish twice but her heart had failed her, she had always tried not get in a relationship but all her precautions had gone out of the window when she met a guy, who always had a mysterious smile on his face , eyes filled with strange shine, a strange kind of attractive force was all around him which pulled her towards him. she tried to give herself false hope that she can vanish from here also and with time everything would be back to normal. but she had never imagined that it could be so hard for her to vanish from here. with every passing day vanishing from here was becoming more and more harder. She new that she had to leave this place quickly. but before leaving she wanted to say GOODBYE for the very first time, but she didn't know how to say it as she never had.

Her dream of her exit from this world was no more her dream, she wanted to leave this world as quietly as possible, she didn't want anybody to miss her or even remember her name. she no more wanted her kingdom, which had grown exponentially with each passing day of her life, The Kingdom of Hearts.she no more wanted to DREAM !

Sunday, December 13, 2009

The Myth of Free Will

“Do whatever you wish to do”, this is a sentence that we have all heard be it from our parents / siblings / friends / girl friend / boy friend / even politicians and the so called liberators. The sentence seems to be simple and clear but the question that arises is do we really do what we wish to do even when we are told to do so. The answer to this question is tricky as the question itself, it is a fact that whenever we are told to do whatever we wished to do , at these very moments we actually are supposed to do the opposite i.e to do whatever we are expected to do or simply whatever the other person wishes us to do. So most of the times we tend to do whatever others wish us to do. Now the question arises does the free will exist?
“Free Will” has been linked to freedom, freedom of expression, freedom of thinking, but how free is our mind today, how free and independent is our thinking? The media is controlling what we think and how we think; media is proclaiming the accused as criminals even before they have been proved so in the court of law. This has led to jury being influenced by the media trails and recently many faulty judgments were passed which many intellects opposed. what is right what is wrong , what is moral what is immoral is being decided by the people other than you, other than your own intelligence and analytical mind. Whatever we do is always dependent on the fact what others will think of it rather than what “I” as a person think of it. Let me try to give an example, let us say a college girl in a western country does not wear miniskirts or other such clothes, what is the image she creates for herself- that of a bore, unattractive, idiot and nobody pays attention to her or gets too much of undue attention…. she is forced to wear the kind of clothes which helps her to move with the crowd. Now take the example of a college girl in a conservative Asian country, if she dresses the same way as girls in west she would be considered a slut and looked down upon. What happened to her freedom of wearing whatever she thinks is good for her , what about her free will. This is just one example, this applies to almost all walks of life be it when we vote for a political party , it not we who decide whom to vote for but the some other person who tells us this political party is good that is bad, who tells us these policies are good those are bad. It is same when deciding about whether a movie is good or bad, say you have heard a lot of good stuff about a particular movie from almost every friend of yours and you decide to watch it. After watching the movie you do not find it up to the expectations but when your friends ask you how you liked the movie you have doubt about your own assessment and join choir praising the movie. Almost everything that we have to decide is being decided for us by somebody else, but we fail to realize this.
Free will goes for a toss in every aspect of now days life, the only place I think of where it may still exist is the solitude of Himalayas. But it isn’t easy to go there and be there so we better continue to cherish the pseudo freedom , pseudo democracy, pseudo equality …..

Friday, November 20, 2009

short trip home

Once more I fly home, fly home to my home. Upon reaching the Srinagar airport the first thing that struck me was that I needed to get into the airport building as quickly as I can, I was shivering with cold even when it was 11:30 and the sun was shining. The next thing that struck me was the gauge on freedom of communication enforced by the Govt. My cell phone was not working nor could I find any public phone in the so called international airport. Somehow I managed to make the necessary call requesting a co-passenger.
After leaving the airport when I was passing through the city, I felt that something was missing, the city which is usually full of hustle bustle seemed to be dead ..... something had changed. The winter made its presence felt; be it through the shivering of my body or the people around me fully clad in woollens especially the pherans, the pink cheeks, the kangris, red noses ......
After reaching home the first thing I asked for was a kangri and pheran. Later in the evening the lack of freedom of communication haunted me again, the land line phone in my home has not been working for past 4-5 months but still we pay the Govt. owned telephone company (BSNL). I needed to make a call so came out of my home and started to scan the market for a S.T.D booth, after scanning the whole market could find just one. The booth was full of people, finally when I got the chance to make the call , people behind me told me to make it quick. The next whole day did not venture out , only in the evening did I visit one of my uncles and a close friend of mine. While returning it was dark and with no street lights it was pitch black, the result I slipped in the open drain about which I had no idea. I think these freak accidents have become part and parcel of my every trip to home.
As I finished typing the above lines message came that an elderly lady in our neighbourhood had passed away, so I left everything and went to offer the last prayers (Jinazah). Once more the death made it overwhelming presence felt. No matter what ever we do, whatever we achieve at last we leave this world empty handed on others shoulders. As we moved in the form of a procession towards the graveyard , every incoming vehicle stopped on the side of the road to let the jinazah pass, this made me realise no doubt a lot had been lost but still something remains intact here ....

Sunday, November 8, 2009

All the world's a stage ....

Shakespeare wrote “All the world's a stage” and depicted that we are puppets in the hands of destiny, we are just brought, made to play our respective parts and made to leave the stage. He gave equal importance to all the stages, but to me the stage when we are playing our roles is more important. At this stage we have control of what we intend to do and what we do.
If we see around ourselves we can observe that almost everybody is acting, pretending to be what they are not. Some people pretend to be not hurt when they actually are, some pretend to be caring when they dame care about anything, some pretend to be all good when they too have a very dark side, some pretend to be themselves when they don’t know who they are, some pretend to be intellectuals..... , the list is never ending but the question is why to pretend after all. For some, the reason might be that they don’t want to hurt others feelings, some want to be accepted as one of the kind, at the same time some want to be recognised better than rest. The worst reason to me seems to think that the other person may be useful in future and pretend what you think he/ she wants you to. I have got fed up with pretending what I am not , fed up with pretending that I am a stone, fed up with giving hope when I know I won’t be able to help, fed up with pretending that there is no end , I am fed up!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

The habit of wining makes you a coward ..........

It has become a strange thing on the part of parents to make their children believe that they have been brought in to this world only to win and often achieve what their parents failed to. So as the child grows he runs only to win and not to run along friends. They are so afraid of losing that they do what ever is in their hands to avoid it, go to extreme limits . So from childhood these people try to make their life loss proof, they choose friends on basis of their strengths, choose a team which is most expected to win. With these tactics they get a winning streak , but with time they forget what losing is and when the not so likely loss comes their way they don’t know what to do , they don’t know how to handle it ( be it on the professional or personal front) because they never where raised to handle a loss . At this juncture most of these people crumble and shatter to pieces never to rise again. So there is nothing wrong in learning how to loose ..... :)

Monday, October 19, 2009

The Loss Of a Pearl ......

It is being said that the weight of a secret sometimes crushes the person carrying it. I have almost reached that piont where i can shatter to peices. For past couple of months i have been carrying a secret on my feable shoulders and i can do it no more. Al through this period i new that i need to tell this little secret to the person who will be most effected by it, but just was trying to postphone the cursed moment or you can say was trying to gather the strenght to reveal it. These pst couple of months have been very terible for my freinds , with my mood changing faster than the weather of London. I am really lucky to have such good people around me , who care for me and stood by me no matter how much I irritated them.
Now i feel that i should no longer postphone this, but still am afraid of revealing it. I am all the time thinking about how to reveal it most softly , it being a harsh truth which would be hard to believe. I am trying to figure out ways so that I may not hurt the feelings too much as the truth itself will hurt enough. I even tried asking one of my friends help, so as to figure out how to reveal it.But as the diwali is in air she seems to tobe too busy . hope she gets time soon to talk to me and we can decide on how to reveal this harsh truth .

During this period there were not enough moments to cheer about but i went to Delhi on Diwali. I satyed with one of my friends in his hostel, the best thing that happened during my stay there was that I got to play football after almost seven years. I enjoyed playing football very much, and made it a point to play every evening as long as I was there. On the Diwali night the whole campus was filled with sound of crakers ,the sky with light of bursting crakers and later our room with smoke ! Spend almost three eventfull days at the campus and did not venture even once outside it.

while returning back in the train got the company of lot of children, they were going toMumbai to participate in some kind of Karate championship. while leaving from delhi station there was one of the kids crying as he was already missing his mom and one of the others kids was trying to console him by saying ," hay we will be back soon , after all we are not going for too many days" . after enquiring came to know that both the kids were cousins, as i didn't know there name so called them Jai and Viru (snap at the end of blog). Besides my seat there was small girl,one year old, sitting with her parent. Initial observations proved the girl to be harmless, but as the journey progresses the degree of the error of my perception about the little girl started to unfold. first it was her attack on the nose and ears of anothere passenger besides her , by the night fall she had eaten my icecream, almost toren my book to peices and later in the night terorized her parents nad all of us by not sleeping and not letting others to sleep . But over all liked the little devil very much (snap at the end of blog). on reaching back tomumbai one of my friends called up and with a very sad tone said that she had lost the pearl in her ear-ring,I am sure her boyfriend will get her another ear-ring with a more bigger and whiter pearl, but for now the pain of loss of the pearl was eveident. hope evrything goes as planned for next couple of days, hope i am able to hurt less with the bitter truth which i am holding back currently ... Hope .

Monday, August 17, 2009

volo ha baaghvaano.......

From time to time many non Kashmiri's have used these couplets to try to create a connection with natives, even Mr Atal Bihari Vajpai opened his speech when he was visiting Kashmir as the then PM of India. the song that they choose, has a very great significance in Kashmiri history. you can this song is a freedom song, calling on the people and their leaders to rise and fight . fight to make our homeland a better place to live . this song as relevant to today's scenario as it was when it was written almost 70 years back. here i am putting in front of the translation of this Kashmiri song so that u can understand it and understand ........

Arise, O Gardener!
(volo ha baaghvaano....... )

Arise, O Gardener! And usher in the glory of a new spring.
Create conditions for 'bulbuls' (a type of bird) to
Hover over full-blown roses.

Dew bemoans the garden's desolation.
Harassed roses have torn their garments.
Infuse New life into flowers and 'bulbuls'.

Root out the stringing nettle from The garden; it will harm flowers.
Wave after wave of hyacinths are coming, let them laugh.

Total immersion in the love of the motherland behooves man.
If you create this faith, surely you shall attain your goal.

Who will free you, O 'bulbul', While you bewail in the cage?
With your hands, work out your own salvation.

Power and pelf, bounties and royal grandeur are all
Within your reach reach and grasp.
You have only to identify them.

In the garden many birds sing but their notes are varied.
May God harmonize these into one effective melody.

If you must awaken this rosy habitat, give up the harp.
Bring about earthquakes and thunder, raise a tempest.

Kashmiris' fame will again spread in the world if you
Create luminaries like Tazi Bhat, Lalitaditya and Mubarak Khan.

Official writs will again run at your will in case you
Produce a peer of Zia Bhan in this modern age.

Litterateurs of Iran will bow to you in reverence if you
Create a poet with powers of magical narration like Ghani.

O Mahjoor! You created roses in the field of poetry.
Now make a wailing 'bulbul' too in this colourful garden.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

My trip to home …. :)

The word "HOME" is very special to everybody. the mere mention of this word changes the whole environment, so many nostalgic moments start to dance in front of your eyes and a strange smile comes to your face whether you wish it or not. HOME what a word and what a place to be at. When I started my journey towards my home my homeland, I didn't feel any of such feelings; why , I don't know.

On my flight I met couple of interesting people, some where returning to Kashmir after a long interval, some where visiting it for the first time and me just visiting not knowing when will I visit again. When my flight landed and I came out of the airport , I couldn't find any bus which was supposed to be there so that I could reach the city, so waited for somebody to give me a lift after couple of cars passed one finally stopped, the person was very nice and kind he asked me, " where do you want me to drop you" this was very surprising for him to ask me. He dropped me very near to the place where from I could get a cab for home. The cab I took for home had an old fellow as driver , white hair, sharp eyes behind large round glasses, unshaved face. He threw my bag on the top of the cab , I said please make sure that the bag doesn't fall while driving . Then I wondered why am I worried about the bag how fast can this spent currency go , as the journey progressed my assumption regarding the old fellow was proved completely wrong . He zipped past every car ahead of him and on every turn I was trying to locate my bag on top of the car. I really doubted that when I reach I will find my bag on top of the car. He didn't even stop when a security person signaled him to stop, the security person seeing old man on drivers seat couldn't do anything but smile. Some young blood tried to match the old mans speed but failed and I could only see them smiling from behind. He made to remind of a cartoon character , which one I don't clearly remember ..

On reaching home another surprise was waiting for me. I met mom on the door of our house itself. then when I entered I searched for my younger brother , he was in his room pretending to be sleeping and not having any idea of me being there. When finally he got up , I had to tilt my head to meet his eye, he turned out to have grown taller than me !..... :0 ,.then I had my lunch with home cooked fish, had almost forgotten how it tasted as was tasting it after almost 3 years. As I was having lunch my little brother searched my bag for his jerseys , which he had literally ordered for me to bring. After finishing lunch spent some time at home then visited my cousins. The way I was greeted was another surprise for me … they said " u look like a malnourished kid from Darfur", my God !they could have used a softer way to say the same thing. Hope when I start my journey back to Mumbai I am in a better shape …. :)

Monday, May 25, 2009

India In 21st century……………… is still dark !

I don't know how to start what I want to say, I can't find a perfect beginning for this write up….. Seems I will have to do it like this only. I have spent much of my life in my homeland only and have got very little chance to observe the life of the people , residing out side my homeland. But one of my worst experience or observations regarding the Indian culture has been the prevalence of the dowry. People demand it like they deserve it and it is their birth right.
There is no doubt that Parents want their kids to be happy and try their best to provide them all the happiness in this world. But when it comes to choosing a life partner parents restrict themselves to the century old traditions limiting the selection to their caste, region , gotra………don't you think that by doing so they are decreasing the chances of their kid being happily married! Then why do parents turn a blind eye to their kid happiness and wants , I think it is the pressure of the society they live in. the thought, what will people say if my kid marries some person outside the gotra/ community. Don't you think by doing so a parent is paying too much attention to keep the people happy , to whom they are just some other people (not at all special) and they don't matter at all. But on the other hand to their kids they are the whole world , they look up to them as their role models. So don't you think that parents should think more about the happiness of their kids than the society they live in
When finally a good life partner has been found after a draining search comes the question of dowry.
Why should a girls parents pay dowry , is a girl such a trouble to their parents that they agree to pay astronomical figures to any tom dick and harry who marries their girl. Or is their daughter equivalent to a defective commodity which needs to be got rid off as it is only adding to their costs and giving nothing to their family.

Now what is remedy to this disease , for this we don't have to look too far just need to look into ourselves only, whether we are parents or kids. As parents don't you think it would be enough that your kids life partner is from a good family, himself/ herself is a good human being, will be able to keep your child happy. A person who is being thought to be mature enough to choose who represents him/her in the parliament don't you think he/she can choose his life partner as well. Then why don't parents show faith . What is their to loose to have look at the person whom your kid feels is a good person and can live happily with. If you are not satisfied you can still veto your kids choice.

Now what can the kids do……. If a guy is asking for dowry a girl can refuse to marry him, you are not a defective piece , he is dong you no favor by marrying you. Guys you are supposed to be educated , does years of education teach you this. Are you an auctionable article , the highest bidder takes you. For gods sake think how can two people who are supposed to spend rest of their life together ,start of a wrong foot and respect each other ,still be happy. For God's sake think…………..

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Till that day……..

Life seems to be running in circles, we catch with each other just in order to move ahead. Move ahead with hope to catch up again later some how some where some day…………….
when we completed our schooling and every body in our group was starting to move in different directions, we promised each other no matter what will happen we will meet again. some where below in our hearts we had this doubt filled with fear that we may never see each other again , but that hope.........
Dedicated o that hope

Please do not go away
Leaving me on the way
I will miss you a lot
As I will remember you a lot

The gate of the memories
Will never close
How much I will miss you
No one knows..
Tears in my eyes will weep away
But you in my heart
Will always stay….

Dear fragrance
Of your sweet memories
Will make me to look around
As I will always feel
That you are surround..

We will meet , yes we will
Some where some day..
And say we have met…
Some where some way
Don't forget me
Till that day……..!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Fear of loosing what isn't yours…..

Have ever had this kind of fear…….? If not you are lucky , thank your stars. If by any chance the answer is yes, I can only say, "I understand, may God give you strength"

It is being said that when God created man , angels felt jealous.. They felt by the creation of man they will loose their importance, the will loose their closeness to God. All this resulted in creation of the DEVIL (SHAITAN).

When ADAM and EVE where in heaven , not being allowed to taste the forbidden fruit . They felt they where loosing there status of supreme beings, which resulted there in their banishment to earth.

Banished to earth ADAM and EVE planted the seeds of human race, and every day one boy and one girl was born….. Siblings born on same day were married to each other…. One of the sons of ADAM didn't like his life partner instead wanted his brothers wife, this led to the humanities first murder .....

Hitler's fear of loosing superiority ..led to world war and death of millions….

I don't know what my fear will lead to…………
The crescent lining here is all the above people were somebody and I ain't anybody rather I am nobody ………. So don't you worry the world ain't coming to an end….. But some body's is !

Monday, March 9, 2009

Samad pandith .........

The legend of Samad Pandit…………………………on special request

He was the richest person in this part of the world , but what is note worthy is that he was the most generous person of his time. People remember him even today not because he was rich but because he was humble and generous.

In the 19th century there was a disastrous plane crash in the Anantnag district (locally also known as Islamabad ). All the passengers where dead. in this plane the son of the richest person of this part the world was also travelling. The plane crashed in the upper reaches of the region , which had very limited accessibility those days (even today). To add to the difficulties of the authorities it was winter and it is said that during that year Kashmir had witnessed one of the heaviest snowfalls ever . Authorities for many days tried but failed to reach to the crash site. At this point Samad Pandit took the responsibility on himself and used his own labor and resources to reach to the site. It is being said that road was cut out of the snow to reach to the site. ……. This incident can give you an idea that how rich Samad Pandit was !

Now to give an example of his generosity examples are endless………. Let me tell you one example.
In srinagar there was well of family which was very rich but there fortune was playing hide and seek with them. A time had come when this family was left with its name only and nothing else, the outside world had no clue about this. During this period marriage of one of the daughters of the family was going to take place………… the father of the bride was in a dilemma what to do , because nobody new what their actual economic condition was. The worried father paid a visit to his spiritual guide (also known as peer), a god fearing and pious person. The peer delegated the person to samad Pandit, he narrated the whole scenario, with respect to their economic condition and the expectations of the people, to him. Samad Pandit said to this person that you celebrate your daughters marriage as if you were in the most sound financial conditions and don't worry about the money………….. This fact that Samad Pandit had financed the celebrations , including gifts to the guests, came to fore only after the death of Samad Pandit.

Due to these reasons Samad Pandit is also known as the Hatim Tai of Kashmir………

Kisike muskrahatun pe ho nisaar
Kisika gum ho sake to lai udaar………
Jina isi kaa naam hai

Saturday, February 28, 2009

I MISS YOU...........!

Beautiful where the days when we cared for nothing valued for nothing but the friendship and friends
Those were the schools days which we all cherish a lot……….
I too had a friend who was my best friend ………. We were considered to be of " viru-jai" genre.
People needed to search for one and would find both of us……. The first time a had to stay outside my home for more than one month, I missed him so much, I even wrote a poem !
All good things have to come to an end so had our friendship……. When he decided to become wise..
Yesterday I received a call for him ,seeing his number I was filled with all sorts of emotions , I greeted as warmly as I could not waiting for himm to say anything , not even a hello……………. Then he said, "you had my number and you didn't bother to call, shame on you" and cut the call. I was shoked and didn't know what to say. Later I tried to call back , but he didn't receive my call.

Dedicated to those innocent mischiefs and to the wisdom…….

So many are here
So many are there
But no one is so near
To tell him the rare…..

My only friend is there
Across the barrier
Waiting for me ….
To cross and to be there

He is my best friend
And for me so dear
That life with out him
I can't bear.....

I am alone here
Waiting for you to be near
As no one is so worthy
To fill your gap dare

I miss you
Truly I miss you..
Oh dear…...
Do you hear.?

Sunday, February 15, 2009

My Home town cont.....

"Mum kin nahin ki sard ho woh khake arjumand
Jis sarzamein main ho ateshai chinar" (Dr. allama iqbal)

Mile stone reads SPORE 0 km, this is the square which you might have been imagining to be Trafalgar square of the LITTLE LONDON. But when you raise your gaze from the mile stone up, above and around what do you find, GRAVES and graves every where around you. This is one more surprise that this town gives to every body. Despite being so much business oriented in the past (desperately trying to continue so…) this town has at its heart DEATH. i never understood why the forefathers of this town chose the centre of the town for the grave yard….!

No denying the fact that this town has seen some of the most beautiful times but it also has past through some of the grimmest times as well. But these things have not dented the spirits of the inhabitants . They have been coming up conquering every adversary despite all odds. This is the reason that the inhabitants have earned themselves titles like "THE BRAVE HEARTS" , "THE SPIRITS THAT CAN'T BE BROKEN" ,"REBELS" and many more.

At some time in the past "The WULAR" devour one hundred people at a time………. The whole town drowned in grief, at that time the town was very small as compared to now, when it has become the largest town of the state and still its growth has not shown any signs of seizure . This was not the only time when a calamity of this enormity struck the people of this town. The calamities continued to come at regular intervals and tried to dent the spirits of people, cease the smile of the ever smiling people,b e it in the form of earthquake or fires, but up till now it has never succeeded.

6th of January 1993 was one such fate full days when death would again pay a mass visit to this town. The chilled morning began in the usual way, with the silence of winter being broken by the murmuring sound of the people walking on the frosted snow. no one new that this day would change lives for every single person of this town , it would change the meaning of 6th of January. On this fate full day , the main market (business hub) of this town was burnt, damages ran into cores of rupees . There are families who have not yet recovered from the financial loses incurred during that fire. There were some loses which nobody would be able to recover from , ever…….. The loss of near and dear ones , loss of family members, some even lost their CHILDHOOD !...... I wont go in to the details about how this happened but I would like somebody else to do the talking, who is more credible than me , THE TIME magazine(,9171,977469,00.html ). On that fateful day there was not a single family which was not effected, who had not lost somebody or was not injured. This inhuman incident brought the whole town together , with out fearing for their own lives they came for rescue of the injured , retrieved the bodies of the dead from the burning rubble, where even the professionals would have hesitated to go and above all came together to console each other.

I was I kid of 7 years then. On that day like all, my father had also left home for office, my father's office was situated on the outskirts of the town and we used to live on the other periphery, me and my mom were enjoying our winter holidays at home. By evening our joy had changed into concern. After the fire the whole town had come to a stand still there was no public or private transportation. There were no means of commuting , a person in one corner of the town had no means to reach the other periphery. My father didn't come home that night, till the next morning concern became graver and my mom became restless. During those days there were no mobile phones and the landline telephones were very rare to find and if one was lucky enough to find one during winter he still needed all gods favor to find it in working condition . Till evening there was no news of my father, then suddenly my mom came and told me that a truck had come into the locality just check it out. When I reached at the spot where the truck was parked I found that it was carrying the dead bodies of the people from our locality (which had been identified form the identity cards they were carrying) . I remained near the truck till it moved on. When I returned mom was waiting at the gate , she inquired who's dead bodies were they ……………… the night was coming fast and still we were without any information . The whole night my mom was awake hoping for somebody to come and give us any information. Next day at around noon a person came and informed us that dad had called up and he was fine, no need to worry. Finally the torture was over……………. But still I couldn't figure out why mom sent me to check the truck that had come to our locality when she knew what horror it was holding. I do not have the courage to ask my mom so think I may never figure it out .

Recently one more tragedy paid its visit to this town. A boat carrying 40 children capsized in the WULAR killing all the children and their teacher. The children were of the age group 5-11.what was disturbing was they were in a navy boat and navy base is at the bank of the lake, about who was responsible and how it happened i don't want to go in details , you can research yourself (depends were from you research....)

I think I have found why the forefathers chose the center of the town as grave ward. This is their way of staring straight at the death and telling it that it can't bend us , it can't break our spirits, we will continue to rise from the rubble to reach for the stars….. On the other hand they wanted us to remember all the time that nothing is permanent in this world and one's success in this world should not get to his head, as finally all have to sleep under the earth………………….

We continue our battle with death, and it is us who will always win ………………….

"khudi ko kar buland itna ki har tadbir sai pehlai
khuuda bandai sai poochai bata teri raza kaay hai " (Dr. allama iqbal)

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

My home town

HAMEIN AST" (Words of JAHANGIR on getting a glimpse of Gulmarg)

My home town is situated on the banks of river “JEHLUM” (as significant as THAMES) sandwiched between two of the most natural beauties in this part of the world. On one side there is the world famous hill resort "GULMARG" and on the other side Asia's largest sweet water lake , "WULAR". Both of these world famous tourist attractions have their own legends so has my home town "SOPORE".

My home town has been named after one of the most eminent engineer that my home land "KASHMIR" has ever seen. His name was "SOYAA", he belonged to a lower cast Hindu family. He was not allowed to study with other kids at the school initially but after much persuasion and request from her mother, the high cast teacher allowed him to come to his classroom, the teacher was shocked to find out that what ever he taught or was going to teach his students, Soyaa new that already. "SOYAA" represents never giving up, always surprising by doing what nobody expects from you, exceeding the expectation; so does this town and its inhabitants named after him.

Kashmir in olden times had a very big problem of frequent and devastating floods. So one day while pondering over how to stop the frequent flooding, the king asked for SOYAA's help. SOYAA came with a completely out of box suggestion, he asked the king to give him two boats filled with gold coins and promised that the problem would be solved. With two gold filled boats , SOYAA went to the bottle neck of the river "JEHLUM" that was causing the flooding . He threw all the gold coins in the river and announced that who ever brings the coins out of the river can have them, but with one condition that the stone or rock under which the coins are has also be brought out also.

He had just completed saying these words and every tom, dick and harry was in the river trying to grab as much as possible. With in no time the whole river bed was cleared of the obstruction causing floods.

From old past now let me come to the recent past. After my hometown was named in honor of the great engineer, it has been since then been called and known by various nicknames as well. The most well known nicknames include "CHOTA LONDON" or "LITTLE LONDON" and "APPLE TOWN" . The first name was bestowed because of the amount of the business that was done here and the amount of money that used to change hands . The second nickname comes due to the reason that my home town was responsible for the production of the 90% of the apples. Apples EVEN NOW are responsible for the generation 60% income for the whole state when there are now various other options aswell. The business was so big in my home town that it led to the birth of such a big business man who used to lend money to the county's govt,(when they needed the funds desperately), his name was SAMAD PANDITH (his legend some other time). With all these things in mind what do you expect the central square, where the milestone reads ZERO, will be harboring..……. (r u imagining some sort of Trafalgar square)….to know what it actually harbors wait for the next update

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Slum dog millionaire

……………………… now these three words automatically come to fore in a discussion when somebody mentions about slum dog millionaire. – 1st A.R REHMAN, 2nd golden globe awards, 3rd “it talks about a teen from the slums of Mumbai”. And then suddenly we are becoming proud enough to call ourselves Indians. So what in this movie makes us proud enough to shout at top of our voice our nationality, other than the music is composed by A.R Rehman, and the actors have done a commendable job (except Irfan, I think the performance was below his own standards). Let us take some time out and think (who have watched the movie, obviously)
…………………………hard to find anything let me try to help………………. Can we be proud of taking away from the children their childhood, which is what is being done in this country every day every moment somewhere or the other (there is a “MAMAN” in every locality). Can we be proud of the way in which the law enforcement agencies function here, be it of inaction when action from them is most needed or there going all guns after the accused to extract confession from him. They have already declared him/her as criminal, based on certain biases which they always consider to hold true? So what are we proud of, maybe it is too complex and confusing question to answer. We can leave this discussion as it is, it is becoming too discomforting for both of us!
Let us talk about the movie and what I liked most about it.
This movie is about a 18 year old uneducated, slum born, orphan who does what no educated- doctor, layer , engineer or general knowledge wala has hitherto done. He wins Rs 20 million on the game show “ Who Wants To be Millionaire”. He is being arrested on doubts of cheating , after that is being tortured to know how:
1. Police officer: what the hell can a slum dog……possibly know?
Jamal: the answers!
The way Jamal explains the reason he knows the answer for each question, with each answer the mystery of Jamals life gets unraveled bit by bit. The story telling is such that it keeps you glued . some of the parts which I liked most are:
2. The shot in which the security personnel are chasing the kids through the slum , the sleeping dog opens its eyes and raises its ears , and the kids rush by it, is awesome!
3. when jamal along with salim and latika are being brought from the dumping grounds to the Maman’s place . As they arrive , seeing all the children playing , the smile and glow on the face of jamal & company tells it all, no words required. Fabulous work kids, hats off to you.
4. when jamal is getting ready to sing the famous bajan of Surdas before Maman, not knowing that Maman intends to make him blind and earn dubble through this heart touching bajan ………Jamal and Latika in their innocent discussion-”bas Maman ko mera ganaa pasand ayai to bohut maal milaay ga…dhair saraiy paisay Latikaaa !”..….beik nahi mangni padaigey.. “beik ! tu pagal ho gayei hai,.. habour road pai banglai main rahain gain , tu main aur salim teeno musketeers” habour road sachi !…….. “haan……..chandni ki raat main, tu aur main. Tum aisay dance karaiginaa……………..” jaisa tum dance kar rahi ho na waisa gana mat ganaa …………………… “mairey bari aagayi”, theek sai ganaa…………………………….. “aaaj hamara time badal gayaa bhaiii”……………….
5. “……………is this heaven,. you are not dead, ……………” And the aging process that goes with this , makes me to go to my childhood when I was watching a movie and it started with a young boy running ( why he was running I don’t remember), by the time boy completed running he was transformed into the young man all had to watch. But the only difference in this movie is that you don’t realize when the transformation actually happened.
6. …………….Jamal becomes a tour guide at the Taj Mahal………….. “but as you can see the swimming pool was finished on schedule”………………………….“she died in an accident” , but i read that she died of child birth, “exactly sir she was on way to hospital” ………… “the guide book was written by some good for nothing Indians”
7. ………. Acting as a tour guide to an american couple…….. “this is the India’s largest dobi-ghat, it is said that every person in Uttar-Pradesh is wearing a kurta that has been washed at least once here..”
8. In between the game show there is a commercial break and Jamal has to answer the question , “who has most first class centuries”, he is sitting in the washroom not knowing what to do, enters Anil Kapoor , he comes to know that Jamal does not know the answer so what does he do, he feeds Jamal with the wrong answer. Telling Jamal he can become the second person to become Raja from rags, as him. Its human nature, you want to lonely at the top, you don’t want anybody else to do what you were able to do. You don’t want to loose the no. 1 spot. And then comes the unexpected move from Jamal by not choosing the answer provided by the lonely man at the top.
9. All along the movie salim is heard saying “ GOD is good”, but as he dies he says “ GOD is great”. I don’t know what was running through the scriptwriters or directors head , but this shows that how much attention was paid by them to what may appear minute things, but actually are things of great significance and add value to this movie.
10. Salim lay’s for himself the death bead of money, it seems similar to what Alexander did . when Alexander was on his death bead he told his minister that when his body is taken for burial his hands should be clearly out of the coffin , so that people could see that even after ruling half of the world he was taking nothing with .!! I don’t know whether this shot was shot in this way by keeping this thing in mind but I don’t know why I remembered this when I saw it…………
There are many more things that I liked about the movie, but if I would had mentioned them too then the enjoyment you would get by watching the movie would had been lessened a bit . and I don’t want that to happen. No doubt there are some minor errors in this movie as well . I am trying to be different today, I am supposed to be good at seeing errors and mistakes so I am trying to see only what is good ,trying to change….. know bad habits dry hard by the way I couldn’t understand how come Jamal found and called his brothers mobile number from an non-domestic call centre, ops! …………. It is better I stop here……...... . After watching the movie you can at least say we have got some good writers in this part of the world unless you go by J.W. Eagan’s saying “never judge a book by its movie. ( no offence ment for the writer, haven’t read the book yet!)… so enjoy the movie…….

Monday, January 12, 2009


On a dreadful night,
a person had to run from his his home
to come to rest his flight
in a ruin of one room.

with nothing to eat
n nothing to drink, but with fear to shrink.

exhausted, he laid on the hard Floor,
as he was in his own glore.

eyes he raised towards the ceiling,
decorated such , he couldn't resist but praise.

praising he closed his eyes,
for in the morning to be surprised
shocked, he watched the sun rise .

he had slept in a ceiling less room
for him to discover the ultimate truth,
the great great architect was GOD himself,
n all the praises are ONLY for his self...............

Friday, January 9, 2009


why is it so that i don't know
or is it i don't wana know.

why the world is round?
why is it that i have to know.

why is it so.......

where is the current row?
how will that help me to grow.

why should i know!

what happens if i don't know
what i want , what is there to want

why is it so
that i have to know!

Wednesday, January 7, 2009


This is the question that i had to face repeatedly in past couple of days. so i answered- i don't, but i couldn't make out what the expressions that followed meant. Today one of my friends asked me "by what name do i have the blog" , i didn't know what to say . i was trying to figure out what to say when he said ," it is ok if you don't want to tell me" . so pausing our conversation at that very moment and i engaged my self in this highly engaging work of creating a blog so that i could tell my friend i have a blog with the name " al-haqu murun" , this phrase means truth is bitter and in today's world if you tell truth (that you don't blog) hardly any body will beleive, no matter even if he/she is your looser friend.